I am an Anomaly
I have known it for quite some time now; my friend confirmed it yesterday. It wasn’t like a big shock or anything, but it did make me realize that if I want people to hear what I have to say, I have to dial it back a notch; down to where they are so they can hear me. When I blast from my tower up here at this incredible vibrational space, no one can hear me, except for maybe dogs and other animals. I’m starting to realize there are no other humans in this space that even I can see. How did I get here? Where is everyone else? The higher your vibration rises, you will find your universe gets smaller and smaller.
I’m referring to where I’ve landed because of my following a spiritual journey (two words that weren’t in my vocabulary five years ago). Apparently, this place is not believable to others. I find it funny that I can’t believe what I am experiencing, and I live this every day. Of course, there is no way anyone else can believe me. They cannot relate to it because it is nowhere near their reality. If I’m singing loudly from a frequency they aren’t tuned to, they cannot hear a word I say.
Where my five-year journey delivered me to – that is not possible for us to comprehend – is a place of complete peace and utter stillness. I have been completely present for years where I do not have a mind with thoughts. I am not thinking about things or other people or birthdates. I am still. I am here. I can simply be.
My emotions have risen to the top of the chart, and that is where they remain. I don’t drift below happiness. I cannot judge others, and knowing others see me with antennas, and a third eye above my head doesn’t affect me. It is all love. They cannot understand, and I’ve been where they are. All of them.
When I realized I was at this space, for the first time in my non-stop mission to find “it,” I realized the search was over. This was the thing I had been searching for all along. I have found the ‘thing’ we are all looking for. The thing is, it’s not about how you get here; it’s that you never stop searching. Never park your spirit because there is something ahead if you don’t give up. How did I get here in five years?
First, a woman appears and recommends a book. I was hooked; this was a completely new language for me. She recommended a second book; I was all in. Pandora’s box was open with the energy swirling so ferociously it could never be contained again. I was insatiable. From the second book, I found a third, then a fourth. I listened to them as I commuted or when I walked. I can’t sit still long enough to read an actual book.
As I read through my massive new library, I followed the guidance that came my way. The more I read, the more I began to re-member who we are and why we are here, the wilder the guidance would get.
By the time I finished seventy books with hundreds of hours of listening, a new realization had taken over. I realized these books that started my journey were a trail of breadcrumbs I left myself. After I finished one, it took me to the next, then the next, and so on. With each book, it wasn’t as if I read it and learned something for the first time; it was my re-membering all of the content in the book. I became the information. I always knew it; it was like I was rebooted after each book, storing the new data. These are the best words I can find to describe how it all downloaded into my soul.
Over the last six months, and after finishing many of Caroline Myss’ audible books, I catapulted through my spiritual crisis and came out on the other side. Now I’m starting out on a new life. I’m leaving a 26-year relationship, my 25-year career as a radio personality, and the place I’ve loved spending my life for the last 26 years. Washington is such a beautiful state, but there are places I need to go.
Here is the thing most of the people in my universe can’t handle. We all see everything in my world is shifting. I have absolutely no idea about where I’m going or what I’m going to be doing. But I’m totally okay with all of the unknown. I have been living by doing nothing but following guidance for the last year or so. I am always in surrender mode, allowing what is on its way to me to get to me. I am open to receive, and I am over the top filled with love and gratitude. This is it – seriously.
Living from this space has delivered miracle after miracle, day after day. I share my daily miracles with my tiny circle of close friends who can’t quite understand what I have going on, but they are there for me and enjoy my energy. They hopefully can see me as the promise.
The crazy part is, if I got here, anyone could get here. I was a poor and abused little girl from Henderson, Nevada. My childhood was so tragic that it swung the pendulum from the extreme sadness I felt growing up to the immense bliss I live with today. I have been where you are. You can hitch onto this wagon and start to climb out of your darkness. Start with baby steps, just do something. Keep moving forward. When you lift your emotions, you will begin to find your power. It truly is all right there in our own ruby slippers.